open arms

(blouse NORDSTROM, trousers THRIFT STORE, sandals BIRKENSTOCK)

SOMETHING WAS DIFFERENT
HER THOUGHTS STILL RACED
HER MIND STILL WANDERED 
BUT SHE WASN'T HELD CAPTIVE BY HER PAST
SHE FELT LIBERATED THAT SHE COULD FULLY IMMERSE HERSELF WITH LIVING IN THE PRESENT MOMENT
NO ONE OR NOTHING COULD MAKE HER FEEL THE GUILT AND PAIN SHE LIVED THROUGH
NOT EVEN HER
EACH DAY WAS TRULY A BLESSING WITH AND WITHOUT THE STRUGGLES
SHE KNEW SHE COULD GET THROUGH THE DAY 
BEAUTY SURROUNDED HER
LIFE WAS HAPPENING ALL AROUND HER AND SHE WANTED TO FEEL IT ALL
ALL THE PAIN
ALL THE LOVE
SHE WELCOMED IT ALL WITH OPEN ARMS

ruffle mustard gold goodness

(top SAVERS, jeans THRIFT STORE, necklace WACKO, sandals STEVE MADDEN)

SHE WAS RESTLESS AND LAID IN BED FOR AN HOUR BEFORE SHE DECIDED TO WAKE UP AND START THE DAY. SHE ANTICIPATED ALL THE TASKS THAT SHE HAD TO ACCOMPLISH. BUT FIRST COFFEE. SHE POURED HERSELF SOME INTO HER FAVORITE GEOMETRIC CERAMIC MUG. WHERE WOULD SHE BEGIN HER DAY. SHE SKIMMED HER RACK OF CLOTHING PICKING OUT A RUFFLE MUSTARD GOLD BLOUSE PAIRING IT WITH HER LIGHT WASH MOM JEANS. SHE ALWAYS ELEVATED HER LOOK WITH ACCESSORIES AND PICKED OUT A MINT GREEN STATEMENT NECKLACE THAT ADDED THE RIGHT AMOUNT OF QUIRKY TO THE OUTFIT. AND FOR THE FINISHING TOUCHES SILVER METALLIC PLATFORM SANDALS. GETTING DRESSED WAS CHECKED OFF HER LIST. SHE WAS READY FOR WHAT THE DAY HAD TO OFFER. 

sorry I'm not sorry

( top BUFFALO EXCHANGE, skirt NORDSTROM RACK, earrings BROOKLYN BAZARR) 

SHE WATCHED DAYS TURN INTO WEEKS..WEEKS TURN INTO MONTHS..MONTHS TURN INTO YEARS THE TIME WAS NOW..NO BETTER TIME THAN THE PRESENT..

WHY HAD SHE WAITED TO BEGIN ANYTHING THAT SHE KNEW SHE COULD ACCOMPLISH..HER WORDS FELL FLAT..WHEN WOULD THEY BECOME CONCRETE..THERE MUST BE SOMETHING HOLDING HER BACK BUT WHAT WAS IT.. SHE HAD EVERYTHING WITHIN HER REACH..

SHE WAS ALWAYS THE ONE TO HELP OTHERS BUT WHY NOT HERSELF..HER SELF WORTH WAS LOW..SHE KNEW SHE THERE WAS MUCH MORE FOR HER TO OFFER THE WORLD BUT SHE HELD BACK..BUT THAT WAS THE THING WITH HER WHEN WOULD SHE STOP HOLDING BACK..SHE HAD TO STOP APOLOGIZING FOR BEING HER..THE TIME WAS NOW..

I find that often times people apologize for being who they are and the word sorry gets tossed around loosely. BUT you know what I'm not sorry "SORRY I'M NOT SORRY" for being me and you shouldn't be either. The challenge is to stand up for who you are and to not let others second guess your integrity. I love myself and that is not a crime!!

content

(jeans MOSSIMO, blouse BUFFALO EXCHANGE, sandals FRANCO SARTO) 

I've been really content these days. I have no major fears or worries of what's to come which is really rare for me. I'm usually an anxious person and have things that bother me daily but as of late I'm not sweating the small things. I think it's because I have been constantly surrounding myself with an encouraging support system who are amazing individuals helping me reach my goals daily. Life isn't that scary so much when you have people who truly love you cheering you on to help you reach your full potential.  

waiting

(top BUFFALO EXCHANGE, dress THRIFT STORE, boots and necklace TOPSHOP)

SHE CONCENTRATED ON THE CANDLE FLICKERING. THE LIGHT MADE A SHADOW OF HERSELF AGAINST THE CONCRETE WALL.SHE FIDDLED WITH THESE TINY PEBBLES THAT SUBBED AS GRASS WHILE SHE SAT THERE WAITING. 

WAITING USUALLY MADE HER UNCOMFORTABLE AND HER PHONE WAS AT A LESS THAN 20 PERCENT BATTERY LIFE SPAN, SHE COULDN'T HIDE BEHIND TECHNOLOGY ALL SHE COULD DO WAS SIT AND WAIT. THE VOICES OF OTHER CONVERSATIONS FILLED THE AIR, FLOATING AND HOVERING ABOVE HER. SHE FELT CONNECTED AND BECAME MINDFUL OF THE SIMPLE THINGS OTHERS TEND TO OVER LOOK WHILE WAITING. 

It's crazy how fixated we are with our phones. I was challenged yesterday when my phone hit the below 20% life span so I couldn't fidget with it while I waited for a friend in the restroom while we were at a cafe for dinner. I sat there what seemed like forever without my phone which was so silly. The ambiance was so beautiful and I just sat there being mindful of my surroundings.